The Impact of Trauma on Adult Life

Healing Financial, Emotional, and Behavioral Scars 

Trauma isn’t always loud—it doesn’t always look like a disaster or a tragedy. More often, it’s quiet, subtle, and sneaks into our everyday lives, shaping how we feel about ourselves, our relationships, and even our money. Trauma affects us far beyond childhood. As adults, we carry these unseen wounds into our personal, emotional, and financial lives. Healing begins when we acknowledge the impact trauma has on us, and we start to reclaim our power.

Understanding the Invisible Wounds of Trauma

Trauma doesn’t just affect your emotions—it affects your entire being. Maybe you’ve noticed the weight of anxiety in your chest or the overwhelming sense of fear when faced with certain situations. Whether it’s from childhood, relationships, or systemic issues, trauma has a way of embedding itself into the fabric of our lives.

Many of us go through life thinking, “I should be over this by now.” But trauma doesn’t work on a set timeline. It impacts how we react to stress, how we see ourselves, and even the way we connect with others. When we don’t address these deep wounds, they can manifest in areas we least expect—our finances, behaviors, and mental health.

The Hidden Link Between Trauma and Substance Abuse

If you’ve ever turned to alcohol, drugs, or other substances to numb the pain, you’re not alone. The connection between trauma and substance abuse is deeply intertwined. For many, substances become a way to cope with unbearable feelings of shame, anger, or fear. We might tell ourselves, “Just this once,” but slowly, it becomes a crutch—a way to escape rather than heal.

Understanding this link isn’t about blaming yourself for your choices. It’s about recognizing that trauma creates a void, and sometimes we reach for anything that might fill it. But true healing comes when we face those inner wounds, addressing the pain head-on rather than numbing it.

Money Trauma: The Emotional Scars Behind Financial Decisions

When we think about trauma, we don’t always consider how it can affect our relationship with money. For many of us, financial decisions are steeped in fear, guilt, or even self-sabotage. Maybe you’ve found yourself avoiding bills, overspending to feel a sense of control, or underspending out of fear of losing what you have. These behaviors aren’t random—they often stem from deeper wounds.

Money trauma is real, and it shows up in many ways:

• Fear of Financial Abandonment: Growing up in scarcity or financial instability might make you fear losing money or being left without support.
• Self-Worth Tied to Income: If you were taught that your value comes from what you earn, any financial setback feels like a personal failure.
• Avoidance: Trauma can lead to emotional blocks around finances, causing you to avoid dealing with money altogether.

Healing money trauma isn’t just about learning financial literacy. It’s about unraveling the emotional scars attached to it and building a healthier relationship with wealth.

Unraveling Financial Literacy and Trauma

Financial literacy is essential, but for many trauma survivors, learning to manage money involves more than just budgeting or saving. It’s about healing the emotional narratives tied to money. Trauma often keeps us in survival mode, making us feel like we can’t get ahead or that we don’t deserve financial success.

For example, someone who grew up in financial instability might feel uncomfortable with wealth, unconsciously sabotaging their success because it doesn’t match their narrative of “I’m not supposed to have this.” Healing the money trauma requires unraveling these stories and recognizing that you deserve financial abundance and security. 

Tools for Healing and Financial Empowerment

Healing from trauma—whether emotional, behavioral, or financial—is a journey that requires compassion, patience, and the right tools. Below are some resources that may help you on your path.

Recommended Books for Healing

1. "What Happened to You?" by Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry
   This book offers an insightful conversation about trauma, resilience, and healing. Oprah and Dr. Perry explores how trauma affects the brain and behavior, offering a compassionate approach to understanding yourself.
   Shop on Amazon 

2. "The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Trauma" by Dr. Nadine Burke Harris
   Written by one of the leading voices in trauma research, Dr. Burke Harris explains how childhood trauma affects our physical and mental health and offers science-based strategies to begin healing.
   Shop on Amazon

3. "Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself" by Nedra Glover Tawwab
   Boundaries are a crucial tool for trauma survivors. This book offers practical advice on how to establish boundaries in your life to protect your emotional well-being and reclaim your power.
   Shop on Amazon

4. "The Financial Anxiety Solution" by Lindsay Bryan-Podvin
   Trauma survivors often experience anxiety around money. This book addresses financial anxiety, offering mindfulness techniques and practical advice to help you build a healthy relationship with money.
   Shop on Amazon

5. "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents" by Lindsay C. Gibson
   Many people struggle with trauma stemming from difficult childhood relationships. This book is for those healing from emotional wounds left by immature or neglectful parents, offering practical steps toward emotional independence.
   Shop on Amazon

Healing Tools to Explore

1. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) Tapping Kit
   EFT tapping is a powerful technique for releasing emotional blocks caused by trauma. Tapping on specific acupressure points helps calm the nervous system and bring emotional relief.
   Shop EFT Kits 

   
   
   

2. Financial Planning Journals
   Journaling can help you unpack your relationship with money and trauma. A financial planning journal offers a structured way to track expenses while exploring emotional patterns tied to your finances.
   Shop Financial Journals 

   
   
   

3. Meditation Sounds for Healing
   Meditation is a great tool for calming the mind and body. Apps like Calm or Insight Timer offer guided meditations specifically geared toward trauma recovery and emotional balance.
   Explore Meditation Tools 

   
   
   

4. Healing Crystals for Grounding and Stability
   Crystals like black tourmaline, smoky quartz, and hematite are grounding stones that can help you feel more secure and balanced during your healing journey.
   Shop Healing Crystals 

   
   
   

5. Weighted Blankets for Anxiety Relief
   Weighted blankets provide deep pressure stimulation, which can help trauma survivors feel safer and more grounded. This tool is especially useful for managing anxiety and promoting restful sleep.
   Shop Weighted Blankets 

   
   
   

Closing Thoughts

Healing the wounds of trauma isn’t easy, but it’s possible. Whether it shows up in your emotions, behaviors, or finances, the first step is recognizing how trauma has impacted your life. From there, you can begin the journey of healing—one small step at a time. As you unravel these hidden connections and use the right tools, you’ll find that healing is not just about surviving, but about thriving.

Remember, your past doesn’t define you, and you’re not alone on this journey. Healing takes time, but with compassion, knowledge, and the right resources, you can reclaim your life, your power, and your peace.

You've got this. 💛

The Father Wound

 Healing the Invisible Void

Many of us carry invisible wounds passed down through our fathers—wounds that often go unspoken, yet shape our identity, relationships, and sense of self. The father wound is the emotional, and often spiritual, absence or neglect we feel when our fathers are emotionally distant, absent, or abusive. This wound can leave a lasting void, manifesting in our inability to trust, love, or fully embrace our self-worth.

Understanding the Father Wound

The father wound stems from unmet needs during childhood, such as the need for protection, validation, or unconditional love. This lack of emotional support leaves a gap that many of us spend years—if not decades—trying to fill. For Black and African families, where generational trauma intersects with patriarchal expectations, the father wound can be compounded by cultural silence around emotional expression and vulnerability.

When fathers are emotionally or physically absent, children are left to piece together their own identity without the crucial foundation that a father’s presence can provide. The resulting void can manifest as feelings of abandonment, low self-worth, and distrust of authority figures or men in general.

The Impact of the Father Wound

The father wound affects both men and women, but it often manifests differently. For women, it may create a struggle with self-worth, leading to codependent or toxic relationships where validation is sought from external sources. For men, the father wound may result in emotional suppression, a fear of vulnerability, or overcompensation in areas of career or control. In both cases, the wound leaves behind patterns of fear, avoidance, or emotional withdrawal that influence every aspect of life.

For many, healing from the father wound feels overwhelming, as it involves confronting long-buried pain, grief, and unmet expectations. But the path to healing begins with recognizing the wound and taking steps toward self-compassion, forgiveness, and spiritual growth.

Books to Support Healing the Father Wound

1. "The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love" by bell hooks
   In this groundbreaking book, bell hooks explores how patriarchal expectations harm men emotionally and spiritually, making it difficult for them to fully engage in relationships. This book is a must-read for understanding the impact of toxic masculinity on fatherhood and healing from the father wound.
   Shop The Will to Change on Amazon 

   
   
   

2. "It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle" by Mark Wolynn
   This book dives into how trauma is passed down through generations, offering practical tools to break the cycle. It’s an excellent resource for anyone working to heal not just their own father wound but generational trauma.
   Shop It Didn't Start with You on Amazon 

   
   
   

3. "Absent Fathers, Lost Sons: The Search for Masculine Identity" by Guy Corneau
   A powerful exploration of how the absence of a father affects a man’s sense of identity, this book provides insight into how men can begin healing from the deep wounds of abandonment and emotional neglect.
   Shop Absent Fathers, Lost Sons on Amazon 

   
   
   

4. "Father Hunger: Fathers, Daughters, and the Pursuit of Thinness" by Margo Maine
   This book specifically addresses how the father wound affects daughters, particularly in the form of self-esteem and body image issues. It’s a profound look into how the absence of a father’s love can manifest in destructive behaviors and how daughters can begin healing.
   Shop Father Hunger on Amazon 

   
   
   

5. "Forgiving Our Fathers and Mothers: Finding Freedom from Hurt and Hate" by Leslie Leyland Fields
   This book offers a faith-based approach to healing from the wounds caused by parental neglect or abuse. It emphasizes the power of forgiveness in breaking free from the emotional chains that keep us tied to our past.
   Shop Forgiving Our Fathers and Mothers on Amazon 

   
   
   

Healing the Father Wound: Tools and Practices

1. Journaling for Emotional Healing
   Writing is a powerful tool for processing emotions. Begin by journaling your experiences with your father, reflecting on both the positive and the negative. This helps bring suppressed emotions to the surface, allowing you to identify patterns and begin the healing process.
   Shop Healing Journals 

   
   
   

2. Connecting with Masculine Orishas for Guidance
   In African spirituality, masculine Orishas like Shango, Obatala, and Ogun represent strength, justice, and wisdom. Setting up an altar or making offerings to these Orishas can help you reconnect with the divine masculine and restore balance within yourself.
   Shop Orisha Statues and Offerings 

   
   
   

3. Healing with Hoodoo Oils and Herbs
   Hoodoo oils like protection oil and healing oil, along with herbs such as rosemary and sage, can be used in spiritual baths or rituals to release negative energy, shield yourself from emotional harm, and invite healing. These rituals ground you in the process of releasing the pain associated with the father wound.
   Shop Hoodoo Oils and Healing Herbs 

   
   
   

4. Therapeutic Practices: Embracing Vulnerability
   Therapy provides a safe space to address the pain caused by the father wound. Through cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), talk therapy, or body-centered therapy, you can work through unresolved emotions and reframe your relationship with your father. Even if your father is no longer in your life, healing the emotional scars is still possible. 

   
   
   

5. Spiritual Practices: Ancestral Guidance
   Reconnecting with ancestors through African spirituality allows you to receive guidance and strength. Building an ancestral altar or practicing divination can provide clarity and spiritual insight as you navigate your healing journey.
   Shop Ancestral Altar Kits  

   
   
   

6. Crystals for Emotional Healing: Use crystals like black tourmaline and amethyst to release pain and invite emotional healing.
   Shop Healing Crystals 

   
   
   

Moving Forward: Forgiveness and Self-Compassion

One of the most important steps in healing the father wound is forgiving yourself for carrying the pain for so long. Often, we blame ourselves for the absence or neglect of our fathers, wondering if we were “not enough” to receive their love. Releasing this blame is crucial in reclaiming your self-worth.

Forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean reconciling with your father in the physical sense. It means freeing yourself from the emotional chains that have kept you stuck in pain, fear, or resentment. By cultivating compassion for yourself and your journey, you create space for new relationships, experiences, and personal growth.

Closing Thoughts

Healing the father wound is a journey of reclaiming the parts of yourself that have been lost or fragmented. It’s about understanding that the absence of a father does not define your worth, and that by healing this invisible void, you can create a life filled with love, trust, and inner peace.

Healing the Mother Wound

 Reconnecting with Your Feminine Power

The mother wound is a deep emotional scar that many women carry, especially in Black and African communities where generational trauma and cultural expectations can leave lasting imprints. This wound often stems from unmet emotional needs, strained relationships with our mothers, or the unspoken burdens passed down through the generations. Healing the mother wound is about more than mending our relationship with our mother—it’s about reclaiming our feminine power, understanding our self-worth, and breaking generational cycles of pain.

Understanding the Mother Wound

The mother wound manifests in different ways. For some, it’s the absence of nurturing, validation, or emotional support. For others, it might show up as feelings of competition, guilt, or emotional neglect. The societal pressures on women, particularly within Black and African families, to “toughen up” or suppress their emotional needs often compound this wound. Healing it requires deep inner work, self-compassion, and often, spiritual guidance.

Tools for Healing the Mother Wound

1. Journaling for Self-Reflection
   Writing your thoughts and emotions in a journal can help you understand the pain and patterns associated with the mother wound. By putting your feelings on paper, you begin to uncover the deep-rooted beliefs about yourself that may have come from your relationship with your mother.
   Shop Healing Journals 

   
   
   

2. Ancestral Healing with Orisha Guidance
   In African spirituality, calling upon the Orishas—especially feminine deities like Yemaya and Oshun—can guide you through the process of healing your feminine energy. Yemaya, the mother of the ocean, brings nurturing and healing energy, while Oshun, the goddess of love and fertility, helps with self-love and compassion. Setting up an altar with their statues and offering sacred items like honey or water can deepen your connection to their wisdom.
   Shop Orisha Statues and Offerings 

   
   
   

3. Hoodoo Oils and Healing Herbs
   Hoodoo oils, like protection oil or healing oil, can be used in rituals to heal emotional wounds. These oils, when paired with sacred herbs like sage, lavender, or rose petals, help clear negative energy and invite in love, peace, and transformation. You can incorporate these into your daily self-care rituals or spiritual baths to release past hurts and invite in healing energy.
   Shop Hoodoo Oils and Sacred Herbs 

   
   
   

4. Spiritual Baths and Cleansing Rituals
   A spiritual bath with herbs like rosemary, sage, and flowers can cleanse your spirit and remove emotional blockages. Adding rose quartz to your bathwater can amplify self-love and healing intentions. These baths allow you to symbolically wash away the pain and trauma associated with the mother wound, creating space for new growth and self-nurturing.
   Shop Spiritual Bath Kits  

   
   
   
   
   
   

5. Divination Tools for Guidance
   Divination, whether through tarot, cowrie shells, Crystal Grid Board or a traditional Ifa board, can help you gain insight into your healing journey. These tools allow you to communicate with your higher self or ancestral guides to better understand the root of your mother wound and how to move forward. Shop Divination Tools 

   
   
   

Healing the Feminine Energy

Healing the mother wound is intrinsically tied to healing your feminine energy. For many women, this wound disrupts their ability to receive, love themselves fully, or step into their power. By reconnecting with African spirituality and using tools like ancestral altars, Hoodoo rituals, and divination, you can begin to heal the pain passed down through generations and reclaim your inner goddess.

Explore More Healing Tools
If you're ready to start or deepen your healing journey, here are a few more spiritual tools to guide you:

• Ancestral Altar Kits: Create a sacred space to honor your ancestors and call upon their wisdom for guidance.
  Shop Ancestral Altar Kits 

  
  
  

• Crystals for Emotional Healing: Use crystals like rose quartz, amethyst, and black tourmaline to support your emotional healing journey.
  Shop Healing Crystals 

  
  
  

• Orisha-Inspired Jewelry: Connect with the divine feminine by wearing symbols of Yemaya and Oshun in your daily life.
  Shop Orisha Jewelry 

  
  
  

Books to Support Healing the Mother Wound

Sometimes, the best way to understand and begin healing is through the words and stories of others. Here are some powerful books by Black, African, and other authors that delve into themes of trauma, healing, and reclaiming one’s power:

1. "All About Love" by bell hooks
   In this timeless classic, bell hooks explores love in all its forms—romantic, familial, and self-love. She dives deep into how healing starts with self-awareness and the courage to break free from harmful patterns. This book is especially relevant for those healing the mother wound and learning to reparent themselves.
   Shop All About Love on Amazon 

   
   
   

2. "The Body Keeps the Score" by Bessel van der Kolk
   This groundbreaking book explains how trauma—whether emotional or physical—affects the brain and body. It's an essential read for anyone working to understand how trauma manifests in their lives and how to heal from it, particularly for those with deep-rooted wounds from their mother-daughter relationship.
   Shop The Body Keeps the Score on Amazon 

   
   
   

3. "Hood Feminism: Notes from the Women That a Movement Forgot" by Mikki Kendall
   Mikki Kendall’s bold and thought-provoking book sheds light on how mainstream feminism often ignores issues affecting Black women. It emphasizes the importance of healing from wounds created by both personal experiences and societal expectations, making it an empowering read for women looking to reclaim their power.
   Shop Hood Feminism on Amazon 

   
   
   

4. "You Are Your Best Thing: Vulnerability, Shame Resilience, and the Black Experience" edited by Tarana Burke and Brené Brown
   This anthology, edited by Tarana Burke (founder of the #MeToo movement) and Brené Brown, compiles essays that explore vulnerability, trauma, and healing in the Black community. It’s a deeply healing book for those dealing with generational wounds and emotional pain.
   Shop You Are Your Best Thing on Amazon 

   
   
   

5. "My Grandmother’s Hands" by Resmaa Menakem
   Focusing on the physical and generational trauma carried in Black bodies, this book offers a unique perspective on healing racial trauma through body-centered therapy. It’s an essential resource for anyone dealing with ancestral pain or the mother wound within the context of generational trauma.
   Shop My Grandmother's Hands on Amazon 

   
   
   

6. "Mothering While Black: Boundaries and Burdens of Middle-Class Parenthood" by Dawn Marie Dow
   This book delves into the experiences of Black mothers navigating societal pressures and cultural expectations. It’s a profound exploration of motherhood, race, and identity, offering insights into the complex mother-daughter relationships within Black families.
   Shop Mothering While Black on Amazon 

   
   
   

Closing Thoughts

Healing the mother wound isn’t a linear process, but by combining spiritual practices with powerful stories from Black and African authors, you can find new ways to break free from generational cycles and step into your divine feminine power.

A Journey Through Trauma, Healing, and Reclaiming Power

 My Story: A Personal Experience

In my early 30s, I stumbled upon a life-changing realization: what I had been navigating wasn’t just the ups and downs of life, but deeply rooted trauma, mental health struggles, and, very likely, PTSD. For most of my life, I thought I could "fix" myself with productivity hacks, stress-relief techniques, or by simply ignoring the pain. None of it worked. It wasn’t until I dug deeper—into the confusion, pain, and silence that had defined my childhood—that I began to see the real source of my suffering.

Growing up, I was the outsider in my own home. No one seemed to see me. I questioned if I even belonged, convinced at times that I had been adopted because of the way I was treated. My home was filled with both physical and emotional violence, yet no one ever talked about it. As if to survive, we all pretended things were "normal." But my body and mind carried the weight of every unspoken word, every broken boundary, and every unresolved fight.

The moment I realized I was traumatized was both freeing and terrifying. I was finally seeing the truth, but it felt like opening Pandora’s box—everything came rushing in at once. The abuse I endured from my uncle, my mother’s dismissal of it as "discipline," the constant sexualization of my body, the verbal attacks—none of it was my fault. Yet, all of it shaped me, buried deep in my being, shaping how I saw the world and myself. I was conditioned to believe that asking for help meant weakness, and so I suffered in silence, bottling everything up.

As I entered my twenties, I didn’t yet have the language for what I was experiencing words like "trauma" or "mental health" were absent from my vocabulary. All I knew was that I was angry, anxious, and lost. I buried myself in self-destructive habits like drinking and smoking, running from my past without understanding what I was truly running from. Relationships crumbled around me, and I found myself searching for meaning—through books, movies, and anything that promised an answer to the existential questions that haunted me: Who am I? Why was I born? Why am I here?

It wasn’t until I discovered spiritual teachers like Mooji, Eckhart Tolle, and The Secret that I began to understand that healing from trauma was possible. Their teachings planted a seed, showing me that I wasn’t broken—just deeply wounded. But there was hope. There was a way to navigate through the pain.

The Impact of Trauma

What I’ve come to understand is that trauma is not just emotional—it rewires the brain. The constant stress and fear I experienced as a child put me in a perpetual state of survival, activating the "fight or flight" response over and over again. My brain was stuck in this heightened state, unable to relax or fully process life in the present. The emotional pain was buried so deep that, for years, I didn’t even recognize it as trauma.

This state of survival makes it difficult to form healthy relationships, to trust others, or even to trust myself. For the longest time, I didn’t believe I was worthy of love, happiness, or peace. I blamed myself for everything that went wrong and found solace in being a people-pleaser, desperate for validation and approval.

Reclaiming Power Through Healing

My journey toward healing hasn’t been linear—it’s been messy, painful, and full of setbacks. But it has also been full of growth, love, and the reclaiming of my personal power. As I’ve learned to name my trauma, I’ve also learned to confront it. I’ve found tools that help me reconnect with my body and soul, practices that ground me and remind me of my worth.

One of the most powerful tools has been connecting with my roots—turning to African spirituality, Hoodoo, and the Orishas. By setting up an ancestral altar, I’ve found a way to honor those who came before me, acknowledging the wisdom and resilience that runs through my veins. Hoodoo oils and spiritual tools like protection oil and love oil have become a part of my daily rituals, reminding me of my power to create change and manifest healing.

Connecting with Orishas like Yemaya and Oshun has taught me to honor my feminine energy, to embrace my intuition, and to call in protection and guidance. These practices have helped me step into my power with intention, to face my trauma head-on and begin the process of healing.

Healing Isn’t a Straight Path, But It’s Possible

If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that healing from trauma is not a straight path. It’s filled with moments of clarity and moments of deep struggle. But healing is possible. It starts with recognizing the wounds, with acknowledging the ways they’ve shaped you, and with taking intentional steps to reclaim your power.

For years, I didn’t know help was an option. But today, I know that I’m not alone in this journey. I know that there are tools, communities, and spiritual practices that can guide us toward healing. Whether it’s through spirituality, therapy, or simply sharing our stories, we all have the power to heal and to thrive.

Explore Tools for Healing
As you step into your own healing journey, here are some tools that have helped me:

• Ancestral Altar Kits: Create a sacred space to honor your ancestors and invite their wisdom into your life. Shop Ancestral Altar Kits

• Hoodoo Oils and Spiritual Tools: Incorporate protection oils, love oils, and herbs into your rituals for healing and manifestation. Shop Hoodoo Oils

• Orisha Statues and Offerings: Connect with the divine feminine energy of Orishas like Yemaya and Oshun by creating offerings and sacred spaces. Shop Orisha Statues

• Divination Tools: Use cowrie shells, tarot cards, and Ifa boards to receive spiritual guidance and insight on your path. Shop Divination Tools

Closing Thoughts

Healing from trauma, whether personal or generational, is a journey of deep transformation. By reconnecting with African spirituality, honoring the wisdom of the Orishas, and embracing tools like Hoodoo oils, ancestral altars, and divination, we reclaim our power and rewrite our stories. The sacred practices of our ancestors remind us that healing isn’t just about mending wounds—it’s about realigning with our higher purpose and stepping fully into the radiant power of who we are meant to be.

Take each step with intention, knowing that the path to healing is yours to define. As we honor where we come from, we open the door to where we are going, guided by the strength of those who walked before us.

Let’s continue to rise, heal, and thrive.

Understanding Racial Trauma for Black Women

 A Journey of Healing

Racial trauma for Black and African women is deeply personal, carrying the weight of generations. It’s not just the visible scars of racism, but the silent burdens that seep into our daily lives—passed down from ancestors and family members who, in their strength, had to endure what we now are healing from. For us, healing is an act of defiance, of reclaiming the softness, love, and grace that systemic oppression tries to steal.

When I reflect on my family, I remember the roles that shaped how I navigated the world. My father, firm and protective, worked tirelessly, embodying strength as a shield against a world that saw him as less. My mother, nurturing but weary, carried the emotional labor of making sure we thrived in spaces that weren’t built for us. Growing up, it became clear: both masculine and feminine roles were a response to survival. Yet, while our parents fought for survival, they left little room for softness, vulnerability, or healing from the collective trauma embedded in our skin.

This generational experience of racial trauma isn’t isolated to one family. It’s woven into the stories of Black women across the diaspora, from Africa to the Caribbean, and throughout African American communities. Authors like Edwidge Danticat, Frantz Fanon, and Brit Bennett have echoed these experiences in their works. Danticat, in particular, writes about the haunting effects of political and familial trauma in Haiti, blending historical accuracy with the pain of being silenced for too long. In her stories, you can feel the tension between remembering and trying to forget—a sentiment familiar to many Black women dealing with their own racial traumas.

Racial trauma impacts our ability to feel safe in our bodies, to love ourselves fully, and to step into our feminine energy without fear. The hypervigilance we adopt to protect ourselves, both mentally and emotionally, can leave us disconnected from our feminine essence—making it hard to embrace vulnerability or ask for what we need without feeling unworthy. But healing from racial trauma means acknowledging this disconnection and reclaiming our softness, our right to feel at home in our bodies.

Healing and Reclaiming Our Feminine Power

To begin this healing journey, we must first accept that our trauma is valid. The exhaustion, the hyper-awareness, the need to overachieve just to feel seen—it’s real. But so is the possibility of healing. As we reclaim our power, we step back into our feminine energy, embracing the parts of us that are soft, intuitive, and receptive.

Here are a few tools and practices to support your healing journey:

1. Journaling: Pouring your thoughts into a journal can be an intimate way to process your emotions, especially those tied to race and identity. Writing allows you to release your fears, pains, and hopes onto the page. Shop Journals for Healing  

   
   
   

2. Crystals for Grounding: Crystals like black tourmaline and rose quartz can help ground your energy and promote self-love. Black tourmaline acts as a protective shield, while rose quartz invites in love and compassion—both necessary for racial healing. Shop Healing Crystals 

   
   
   

3. Aromatherapy: Soft, soothing scents like lavender and jasmine can calm your nervous system, helping you to reconnect with your body and your senses. This can be especially healing when you’ve spent years in fight-or-flight mode. Shop Essential Oils 

   
   
   

4. Luxury Self-Care: Embrace softness by indulging in luxury items that make you feel nurtured and cared for. A silk robe, satin pillowcase, or even a bath bomb ritual can remind you that you are deserving of ease. Shop Luxury Self-Care Items  

   
   
   

Understanding the Healing Power of African Spirituality

For Black and African women, racial trauma is a deeply rooted experience, passed down through generations. It manifests not only in societal challenges but also in the personal burdens we carry—feeling like we must be strong all the time, suppressing our emotions, and fighting to be seen in spaces that historically dismiss our worth. This trauma lives in our bodies, in our relationships, and in how we navigate the world. Healing from it requires more than surface-level solutions—it demands a reconnection with our roots, our ancestors, and the spiritual power that has always been within us.

African spirituality and Hoodoo offer profound pathways to healing from racial trauma. They invite us to honor our ancestors, acknowledging their struggles and sacrifices while drawing strength from their resilience. Practices like creating an ancestral altar or calling upon the Orishas—powerful deities in African traditions—allow us to realign with spiritual guidance, protection, and the wisdom that transcends generations.

In Hoodoo, using conjure oils, herbs, and divination tools gives us the tools to manifest change, protect ourselves, and heal from the traumas embedded in our DNA. These spiritual practices aren't about looking outward for validation but about looking inward, trusting in the guidance of our ancestors, and reclaiming our power.

Incorporating these sacred tools into our healing journey is crucial because they remind us of where we come from. They bring us back to the practices that have healed and protected our communities for centuries. As we embrace this wisdom, we take control of our own healing—healing that the world often denies us.

Here are a few tools and practices to support your healing journey:

• Ancestral Altars: Creating a sacred space to honor your ancestors is a core practice in African spirituality. An altar serves as a place to connect, pray, and receive guidance. Items like candles, offerings, and photos of your ancestors help maintain that connection. This practice is important because it strengthens your relationship with those who came before you, acknowledging their influence in your life. Shop Ancestral Altar Kits 

• Hoodoo Conjure Oils and Spiritual Tools: Rooted in African traditions, Hoodoo incorporates the use of oils, herbs, and rituals to manifest desires, protection, and healing. Conjure oils, like money-drawing oil or protection oil, can be used in your daily practice to call in blessings or shield yourself from negative energy. Hoodoo emphasizes personal empowerment through spiritual work, making it a powerful tool for healing from generational trauma. Shop Hoodoo Oils and Spiritual Tools  

• African Orishas Statues and Offerings: Orishas are powerful deities in the Yoruba religion, representing different aspects of life and nature. Connecting with Orishas like Yemaya (goddess of the sea and motherhood) or Oshun (goddess of love and prosperity) can bring emotional healing, protection, and guidance. Offering items like honey, candles, or water in rituals is a way to honor them and invite their blessings. These practices remind us of the balance between nature and spirit. Shop Orisha Statues and Offerings  

• Divination Tools: Divination is an important part of African spirituality and Hoodoo. Tools such as cowrie shells, tarot cards, or Ifa divination tools allow you to receive messages and guidance from the spiritual realm. Consulting divination tools helps you make decisions aligned with your spiritual path and ancestral guidance. Shop Divination Tools    

• Sacred Herbs and Incense: Herbs such as sage, frankincense, and myrrh have been used in African spiritual practices for centuries. They are burned to cleanse spaces, invite healing, and create sacred environments. These herbs are powerful for clearing out negative energies and making room for ancestral communication. Shop Sacred Herbs and Incense   

Healing from racial trauma is not just about surviving; it’s about thriving in spaces that once tried to contain you. It’s about remembering the stories of those who came before you while rewriting your own narrative. Just as we see in the works of Caribbean and African American authors like Toni Morrison or Zadie Smith, healing is about reclaiming the parts of ourselves that the world tried to erase. It’s about learning to be soft, to love, and to honor ourselves in a world that often fails to do so.

Closing Thoughts

Your healing journey won’t be linear, and that’s okay. Give yourself permission to move at your own pace, to rest, and to ask for help. As we heal from the trauma embedded in our past, we pave the way for future generations to know themselves as whole, as worthy, and as powerful.

Remember, healing is an act of resistance. It’s a way to reclaim your body, your mind, and your spirit—and to step fully into the radiant, divine feminine energy that has always been yours.